It’s been a hotter summer than we’re used to here on the West Coast of Canada. So I have not been walking about our neighborhood much; as I’ve stayed cool under our canopy of trees.
Sunday evening it began to rain. I popped my head out of the door and inhaled a cool and delicious breath of summer air spiced with rain. I asked the one I love if he felt like taking a walk in the rain with me.
He said, “Yes.” On went our rain coats and off we went. I grabbed my little camera and left the better one at home since there wouldn’t be much to shoot.
But surprises happen when you least expect them. That’s why they are called surprises. Our handsome first-born and lovely third-born fall into this wonderful category. The middle child we specifically put our order in for.
Although the photos are rather grainy – I think, perhaps, it turned out better this way. It captures the mood of the evening. A farewell to summer? Goodbyes tend to have a melancholy air.
I think it turned out better that we had our children later in life than we had planned. When I was younger I sweated the small stuff way too much.
Five years ago, this month, my brother lost his only child. She would have been 21 this autumn. It hurts so much just to remember. I can’t even comprehend his level of pain… but I do trust that she is in God’s hands.
My niece is not here; but she helps me to love my children more deeply and to not sweat the small stuff. I don’t take my children for granted. My brother was an awesome dad. He loved her deeply.
Greater love has no one than this, that he lay down his life for his friends. John 15:13
My brother would have gladly lay down his life for his daughter.
A gift is free. It takes a bit of trust to open a gift. If we receive the gift it is then truly our own. Authentic gifts are not revoked – but I guess we do have a choice to reject the gift or not…
I was really tempted to lash out at God when my only niece died. The awful phone-call came while I was working on a new rock garden. I shouted out in agony.
But I have had awful news before and I have also temporarily abandoned God before. I have no interest in repeating that scenario!
So, within moments, I made a choice to trust Him no matter what. “Lord, I choose to trust you with my niece regardless of my emotions.”
Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you. I do not give to you as the world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid.
It hurts still, but I spell peace with the word trust… I have had a few more phone calls since that one. They tend to happen a little more as you age…
But I am learning more and more to rely on Jesus; even though He is not visible to my eyes.
One day I will arrive at Heaven’s gate – not because I walked perfectly: But because I chose to trust Him and opened the free gift He offered.
Life is full of surprises, both sad and joyful. When it’s time to hang up my coat, I’ll be heading to the best of the best of surprises. I really want to see you there… meantime let’s walk in the rain, capture rainbows and savor sunsets with the ones we love.
~ Love Wendy
You have made known to me the path of life;
You will fill me with joy in your presence,
with eternal pleasures at your right hand.