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The Heart Beneath a Smile
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What has gone on
in your life
that you would
swear so profanely
at a woman
a mother
a wife?
Where was your father
when manners
were taught?
Did he teach you
to respect
women
or not?
What’s in your heart
that causes such
bile?
How do you switch
so quickly to
hate from
a smile?
Why do you ask
for money
when it’s a new
heart you need,
not food for
your tummy?
Why not choose love
instead of abuse?
If I told you
that God
loves you
would you
still refuse?
Should I judge
you too harshly,
though your mouth
is vile?
No!
I must guard
my own heart
hidden beneath
my own
smile.
Wendy/2012
Here is a poem that I wrote a while ago along a similar line.
http://wendylmacdonald.com/2012/08/13/the-bench-warmer/
This poem was written 3 minutes after the incident described below. I wrote it while I waited for my daughter who was in her piano lesson…
I have never had anyone spew such hateful and vile words at me, as a man did, recently, while I was waiting at a red light. He was standing on a median and wanted me to roll down my window. The sign he was carrying said he needed money. I shook my head no while trying not to look disrespectful or afraid. As soon as I said no, his fury let loose on me.
I locked my door and stared straight ahead. Then he walked away to approach someone else. Before the light could turn green – he came back and yelled the same profanities again, right up against my window. My 12-year-old daughter, beside me, was sick with fright. I don’t have a cell phone (yet).
When I got home after piano lesson, I called the police to report the incident so that they could keep an eye out for the grumpy beggar and his dog. They asked me what time it happened at. It turns out that someone had called on their cell phone at that same time to report him, but he was gone before the police got there. We were not his only victims…
I did not call the police out of hate or retaliation. I called out of love for other women who may get abused by this person. I called because I am not a victim. I am a woman. I am a child of the King. I am praying for that man to get into recovery or whatever he needs – so that he can act like a child of the King, too!
I can’t hand out money when I used my overdraft to pay a dentist bill the day before. My oldest son needs new runners and my younger one needs jeans as he has sprouted again. I am not greedy. I am a mom that wears hand me downs and drives an old van (that I love). But I am still a daughter of the King and my heart overflows with thankfulness for what I do have… Meantime, I am able to give that man the gift of my prayers and forgiveness. ( Forgiving others is a gift to oneself, too!)
Here is the very Bible verse the kids and I were memorizing earlier that day:
Christ suffered for you, leaving you an example that you should follow in His steps. “He committed no sin, and no deceit was found in His mouth.” When they hurled their insults at Him, He did not retaliate; when He suffered, He entrusted Himself to Him who judges justly.
1 Peter 2:21-23 NIV
Blessings from one beggar who knows where to get the Bread ~ Wendy
PS – I could not post this the same day that it happened, as it was still too raw! The next day when I drove my son to guitar lessons (the one who needs runners) , we had to pass by the “scene of the crime”, and there was no one there. I felt relieved. It comforts me that someone had called the police, even before me. We need to help each other, including the homeless, by giving our quality used items to the Salvation Army and by donating to the food banks and to homeless shelters, if we are able. Personally, I don’t think giving money directly to strangers on the street is wise.
We’ve been saving up for a decent guitar for our son, since his is in need… At the last lesson, the teacher kindly did some work on it ( He can build guitars) and now it works great, as he even put on new strings! “Where God guides – He provides!” Not necessarily what we want: But what we need.
“Contentment is not having what you want; but wanting what you have.”
Please pray that my daughter would not have any more nightmares from this incident. And pray that the grumpy beggar would find peace in the generous King.